I'll Take a Green Suit, Please

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Yesterday was a Hazmat Suit kind of day.  I can't even bear to share the details with you (nor do you want me to), but trust me - it was a bathroom nightmare, and it took up most of the morning to deal with it all. 

Thanks goodness I had been "properly trained" on dealing with this kind of thing.  A week or so before this school year began, we had our big "Welcome Back" meeting at a local school auditorium.  Part of this day was an "All District Employees Must See" Health Services message about blood borne pathogens. 

Now, I have had Blood Borne Pathogen training before.  It largely consisted of watching a video of people injuring/cutting themselves in various ways.  Blood would spurt theatrically from the wounds, and then someone would deal with it in a safe and effective manner.

This presentation, however, was different.  With every sentence, the issue of blood borne pathogens got bigger and more relevant.  The phrase "dispose of sharps probably" (which I would have dismissed before) became suddenly more relevant as the presenter reminded us that  "sharps" could be pencils, scissors, even staples.  We were asked if we had masks or gowns to deal with any potentially infected matter.  We were asked what we did with old band aids or tissues with blood on them - did we have a Red Bag in which to properly dispose of them?  

And that was just the regular blood and throw up issues.  Being the preschool teachers that we were, it was soon pointed out that we also deal with all kinds of other - matter - that could present additional problems (as if the fact that we need to deal with those things in the first place isn't problem enough).

By the time that was over, I was ready to order my hazmat suit.  I could just hear my airy, ventilated voice as I spoke through my mask - "Welcome to Preschool, children. Do not be afraid - it is I, you loving teacher."

Not long after this meeting, we got an email that said that it was the custodian's job to deal with any potentially infected materials - they had the Magic Red Bags (and masks and gowns, I presume).     

Of course, as was the case yesterday, you have your potentially infected material (which was everywhere), and you have your child who needs clean clothes because of the potentially infected material, and you have to do quite a bit of glovage and work before you even get to the custodian stage.  I mean, you can't just hand the child over and say, "Hose him down!"

Trust me - the whole incident still left me longing for my own hazmat suit - perhaps in a nice green color.  And while it prevented yesterday from being boring, it also left me again yearning for those fun, easier preschool days....